The little mother...and maternity leave ends

Seems like Ella and I are both juggling our time. She's all about the babies these days. We have several, and she has to have at least 3 everywhere she goes. Upstairs, downstairs, in the car, etc... those babies go everywhere. She nearly had a meltdown when Troy left the house this morning and DID NOT have any babies in the car. Luckily, Laura also has babies at her house, so the need was quickly met. She puts them in the car seat, feeds them bottles, gives them medicine, she's quite the little mother.

I on the other hand feel like I can barely keep up with my 2 babies. After 8 weeks, this was my last day of maternity leave. My last day to focus my attention on Alex and just be his mommy. Monday, I go back to work for 2 days, and then I'll be working from home. Alex and Ella will be here with me, so I'll divide my attention and time between the two of them, and work and this house, etc...

Oh yeah, did I mention Troy? I still hope to fit him and our time as a couple into that schedule somewhere.

I look at Ella and I realize she'll never have as much of my time as she did. I look at Alex and realize he'll never have my full attention the way Ella did as my first baby. I just try to meet both of their needs and be the best mommy I can. They love me for now. I just hope I don't screw that up when I'm home with them 24/7!

Moving to the Home Front... Missing Laura already!

It's something Troy and I have talked about since we were dating. What we wanted out of life. Our ultimate goals, etc... Mine was to stay home and be a mommy. Before we were engaged, or married or had kids, we both agreed how much we benefited from having a mom at home, and how we hoped that one of us would be able to be at home with our children. No latch key kids. That was our girl. Sounds simple, but in the 21st century world of 2 salary families, it's not.

My employer has made me an unbelievable offer that will make that goal a reality, starting next week. They asked if I'd like to return to my position, but work from home and avoid sending both children to childcare. The change would mean a pay cut, but it would also eliminate the major expense of two kids in childcare, and most importantly, it would put me at home, to nurture and care for my children. I can take them to the library, play dates, be there when they come home from kindergarten, etc... It's an opportunity that seems too good to be true. Troy and I feel we have to take advantage of this and do our best to make it work.

From the moment the proposal was handed to me, my first concern was what this would mean to Ella and to "her Laura." From the moment we walked into Laura's living room, both Troy and I knew this was a person we felt safe, comfortable, and grateful to leave our child with. Our first instincts were correct. We couldn't have been luckier. Laura and her family have basically adopted Ella as one of their own. Laura, Josh and their 4 kids (Matthew, Mason, Dalton & Hayley) make Ella feel so special and loved every day.

I knew how much Laura meant to Ella when we were in Florida over Christmas. Ella would play with her toy phone at Grandma Robinson's house and call Laura to tell her about what we were doing. She missed her! Two weeks away was apparently too much.

Starting after the 4th of July holiday, both Ella and Alex will be home with mommy, full time. I'm terrified that I'll now be responsible for two little lives, 7 days a week, 24 hours a day, etc.. But I'm also thrilled that I'll get to be there with and for my kids.

Laura promises to let me call with questions, and to still be our great friend and adopted mommy. She came into our lives 2 years ago, and she'll stay in our hearts as part of this family, forever!

Alex and Ella

She loved him even before he was born. She'd hug my tummy and talk to my belly button and say "baby" all the time. But when she came up to the hospital that morning and met her new baby brother, Ella's life changed.

At first, she was unsure. Mommy was in a bed with tubes and couldn't pick her up. Daddy was there, but she didn't know what to make of all this.

She hugged him, and kissed him on the head and by the time she left, she was calling him by his name. "Alex." (although, when Ella says it, it's ALEC, she's not very good with the x sound.)

She notices every move he makes and every peep. It's always "Alex night night," or "baby Alex." She was in bed last week when Alex started screaming for a bottle, we heard Ella on the monitor saying"Alex crying."

She gets a little too aggressive with the hugging and patting and kissing etc... but so far, she's adjusting really well. Alex had lots of presents waiting for his big sister when she came to the hospital to meet him, so they're off to a good start.

I know the sibling rivalry will come. I had a little brother too. But at least we should have a few years of them loving each other first.

Be careful what you wish for!

My last blog was the beginning of a very long, and exciting weekend.

We celebrated Cinco de Mayo a day early on Friday night, May 4. I really wanted Mexican food from our favorite restaurant, even if I couldn't' have a margarita. I let Troy drink a whole pitcher for both of us... since he had a designated driver!

Too bad for him... Saturday morning I woke up at 6 a.m. in labor.

Alexander Gray Robinson was born at 10:12 that same morning. (Daddy and doctor wanted to make his middle name Paco or Jose... but I vetoed.)
He weighed 8 pounds 2 ounces.
He arrived a month early... my due date was June 1.
He scared us by swallowing a mouthful of amniotic fluid and not breathing for a full 30 seconds.. but a little suction and he was fine. He didn't have to go to the NICU. He's been happy and healthy and went home with us just as we expected.

He's already up to 10 pounds at just over a month old.
Plenty more to come.
But I'll start this post with the first of many photos, photos and more photos!

Still pregnant...

We're officially past the 36 week mark... and waiting (no so patiently) for this boy to make his entrance.

They've stopped contractions with medication, but now they probably won't need to do that if it happens again. My doctor won't do a c-section before 39 weeks, unless we have an amniocentesis that shows the boy's lungs are mature. He recommends we do that after 37 weeks... so we're just a week away from what could be the GO SIGN!!!

We're still on the schedule for a c-section May 25. But my doctor thinks labor will start before that, so I'm hoping he's right. Even so, that's 3 weeks from today, so we're in the home stretch!!!

I'm dilated a little over 1cm and I'm 60% effaced, so the process is in motion. Now we just have to keep that boy moving toward the light! They've given me pain pills and sleeping pills to help with the pressure and pain so I can sleep at night. I was down to just 1 or 2 hours of sleep per night and that was starting to take a toll on my body and blood pressure. Now I'm just big and bloated and have ankles the size of tree trunks!

Troy has to put up with all my complaints, so he may be more ready than I am to have this baby!

Ella on the other hand is enjoying the final days of her time as an only child. She's clingy and loving all over both of us most of the time. She'd rather sit on the couch and snuggle with us than play and run around. I'm anxious to see how she adjusts when baby boy comes home.

We'll keep you posted as we get closer. Troy has a phone list to get the word out once we have a boy. I'll send out emails and photos as soon as we're home.

Until then...

This boy is BIG!!!

We had an ultrasound last week to see just how big. They estimated a little over 6 pounds at that point. Today, my OB says he's probably around 7.5 pounds. I still have a month until our scheduled c-section date.

But I'm having a lot of contractions, some of them pretty intense. They stopped the labor last Friday night with medication. I've been contracting on and off since then. It was rough again last night, but so far we're able to hold this baby off.

As I told my doctor this morning... I don't really like this baby boy right now. I love him and I'll melt as soon as I hold him, but he's killing me and I'm just doing everything I can to keep him in there a week or two longer.

(At that point, we'll go ahead and do the c-section early. But right now, we might risk a week or two in the NICU if he's born this early.)

So mommy will continue to soak in the tub each night, for 15-20 minutes of buoyant relaxation. Those are my only comfortable moments of the day. I've got pain medication to help me get through the night... and the daytime hours at work keep my busy enough that I forget how much it hurts.

It's not kidney stone pain, mind you! But it's annoying and it makes my blood pressure rise and I sweat and get nauseous, etc... I'll manage it for a few more weeks... then my boy can hear about it for the rest of his life!!! He was a pain in the *** before he was even born!

Pain in the Back!!!

This boy is trying to kill me!

He's putting so much pressure on my lower body, I can barely move! Sleeping has become an adventure all it's own. We have enough pillows in the bed for a harem! Troy just shoves them over to my side and tries to help me get them all situated, just so, before I fall asleep. Of course, it's only a matter of time until I have to pee. That's usually a 3-4 times nightly event.

Friday night, I felt my left leg shaking a bit as I left work and got into my car. By the time I got to Laura's house. I couldn't carry Ella to the car or get her buckled in. (thank God for Laura's help!) By the time we got home, Ella had to climb out of the car on her own and help Mommy get into the house.

Troy found us in the living room where Ella was enthralled by ELMO videos. Mommy was stuck on the couch, unable to sit up, stand up, or move in any way, and about to wet her pants. Troy tried to sit me up, lift me up, even stretch my leg. I think a couple of screams led to our call to the OB's office.

Turns out, the boy is putting pressure on a nerve and causing pain and numbness in my lower back, butt, and leg. I got some great pain medicine... but otherwise, there's not much they can do. We tried ice, we tried heat, we tried baths in the jacuzzi with the jets, I tried to stay off my feet as much as possible. Really, the best trick, was kneeling on all fours and just letting my belly hang down. It's not the most comfortable position (or attractive) but it does take all the pressure from the boy and my belly off my back. At least for a few minutes, I'm pain free.

I see the OB again tomorrow morning, so we're hoping for more answers at that point.